Archive for May, 2011

One on One

May 14, 2011

Dear Roman-

I was looking back at posts from a year ago. My how you’ve changed. Your language has developed leaps and bounds, your interests have gotten more mature, your body has grown and thinned out, your hair is thick and coarse. Plus you’ve stopped having tantrums and your attention span has lengthened.

What prompted my reflection was that I spent some much needed one on one time with you today. I took you on a date. Something I look forward to as much as you do. Since it was nice out I decided we’d walk to our favorite neighborhood restaurant Trellis and then hang out at the nearby park. You were so excited! Now I must tell you that Trellis is the kind of spot that takes their time bringing out food. Nothing’s rushed, you’re meant to enjoy the experience. This is the kind of place that in the past would have made me nervous taking you to by myself. But today I didn’t think twice. In fact it sounded like the perfect way to spend an afternoon with you. We sat outside and you ordered chocolate milk (custom made for you) and brioche french toast. While we waited for our lunch to arrive you sat next to me as I read from your new Batman book. When Charlotte’s around it’s impossible for me to read to you. She gets up in your face and does everything she can to take your attention away from words on a page. So the best thing in the world for you is uninterrupted reading time. In fact when our food did arrive you were disappointed because it meant I was going to have to put a pause on all the reading. I was so impressed that you sat at our table for over an hour hanging out, enjoying our time together.

After lunch we walked to the park. The sun was out (a rarity this season for us) and with it the entire neighborhood spilled out of their houses. The park was packed! Instead of meeting new kids you wanted me to stick with you and we acted out the new book we’d just read over and over. You were Robin and I was Batman. You climbed the play structure capturing villains and I did my best to pretend to help. I hated that the fun had to end, but I knew Charlotte was going to be waking up from her nap and that dad (who had knee surgery) would need us to get back home to take care of her. So I promised you we’d have another date again soon.

The thing is that I was in the best mood afterward. Being with you and giving you all my undivided attention felt so amazing. I figured some special time would be good for you (which I know it is) but I didn’t realize how beneficial it is for me too. So thanks for once again being the best date ever!

3 Years 8 Months

May 6, 2011

Dear Roman,

I can’t even believe you’re a month closer to turning four! I mean never in my life could I picture myself being a mom to a four year old. That just seems so old- for both you and me. I’d better know what I’m doing (at being your mom) at this point.

This evening I presented you with a new style of nighttime pull ups since you still have to wear them at night. They had Buzz and Woody from Toy Story on them. So I was like, “look Buddy I got you these new pants to sleep in isn’t that great?” And you took a look and said, “Um Mom, actually those aren’t cool.” You hung your head for awhile and then you said, “well sorry Mom, I mean thanks a lot for getting them for me.” I was laughing so hard I couldn’t help it. How old are you, 10??? Last I checked they don’t make Zorro or Han Solo pull ups, but I’ll double check.

You still love dressing yourself and have gotten a lot better at putting clothes on the correct way, but there are times when everything is backward. I have to say though you pick out really good outfits. Sometimes ( a lot ) I think your dad is jealous of your wardrobe.

Since you gave up your nap months ago you’ve been keeping this crazy early bedtime schedule. It’s great for me since I’m exhausted by the end of the day (ready for a break) and since I have to start my other job as soon as you hit the sheets. But it totally sucks for your dad who can never make it home from work before you pass out. Want to know what time you go to bed? 6 o’clock! One day I know you won’t believe me when I tell you. But seriously you are done for the day by 5pm. It’s a struggle to get you fed and bathed, into pjs and read to before your eyes won’t stay open another second. It’s also kind of a bummer that we never get to go out at night with you. If we tried you’d likely act like a mess of a kid throwing a tantrum and crying at nothing. So we keep you indoors after 5 like you’re a werewolf.

You can pretty much recite every piece of information from your Star Wars dictionary. At preschool the topic was transportation and you guys were asked what you’d like to travel on. All the kids answered boats, planes, trains, etc. You said a Land Speeder.

You love your sister. It’s just hilarious to watch your form of love. Strangers watching have been brought to gasps of horror at times. You’ve been mistaken for trying to smother her… but you’re smothering with love. Kisses, hugs, tickles, pokes she gets it all from you. At times you aren’t at all gentle. Often she gets bombarded and falls over. She’s pretty good at letting you know what she likes and does not like. But the best thing you do and the reason why I know you love her more than Star Wars is that you ask me to tell the story of when you two first met. Over and over. Of course you remember it like it was yesterday, but you still love hearing how we got Baby Charlotte from the hospital. Then you make me tell you that she will always be your baby sister and that we will always keep her.

We should add knights to your list of interests. I took you to another play at the local performing arts center with a few of your friends. Sleeping Beauty was the show and I was a little worried you wouldn’t be into it. But the prince was written specifically for you I think. His character had a light saber as a sword and he wanted to “save the day” every chance he got! You and all your buddies were on the edge of your seats the entire 45 minutes. After the show you wanted info about kings, princes and knights. I got you a foam sword and shield and you’ve been pretend playing ever since. Today we went to run a few errands and you had to go in character complete with cape, shield and sword. Do you know how many ladies’ days you made? A lot. Everyone would say, Oh he’s so adorable. Reminds me of my son at that age.”

You are adorable. We love you.

*In the picture you’re holding up a mothers day present that you made for me at school. You had your teacher write the note for you. It’s SO you.

The Way It Is

May 1, 2011

Dear Roman,

You’re half way to being four years old and about as “boy” as you can get. It’s taken me some time to notice and more time to adjust. It’s hard on your Mama watching you grow and change. It wasn’t all that long ago that you played with stuffed animals and thought babies were cute. You were gentle and liked playing with girls. Everyone always commented on what a “sweet” boy you were. But now, ah now, you are officially a boy who lives and breathes all things masculine. Super Heroes, Star Wars, good vs. evil play, getting bad guys and saving the day. Everything- every single object- turns into a battling tool. Even though you don’t actually have swords or guns or light sabers (yet) you can make one out of a stick or broom, even a straw! You put on a super hero costume or a cape and you transform yourself into a larger than life character who can do anything. You and your buddies love to “battle” and pretend play in a rough and wild way. The lame moms are constantly saying things like, “remember to be gentle” and “make sure you don’t get too rough.” In fact I’m trying very hard to let you be you and all that that looks like these days. I know it’s important for you to explore this side of your personality. And I also know this is, like everything else for you, ┬áis just a phase. So I try and act enthusiastic about pretending to be a super hero side kick. I school myself on all that is Star Wars. I seek out new Lego kits that I know you’ll get excited about and I’m not going to make a big thing about you turning household items into weapons. Because I love my boy. My busy, active, bike riding, cape wearing, smelly little boy.