Archive for November, 2012


November 18, 2012

Dear Roman,

Something very new and different for you has started to occur. You are playing on your own, or with your sister for hours at a time. At first I could not believe it. Because after all you are the kid that involved parents or a grown up in all aspects of your play. “I thought you wanted to play with me” was what we would hear all day long. Finally I started consciously working on having you figure out how to play on your own. It was a slow process starting with 5 or 10 minutes of individual play on your end and then I’d match you with group play time. Over the months we started increasing the amount of time you needed to be on your own. Summer you did quiet time in your room for an hour. At first you were so resistant, but eventually I’d come in and check on you to see you concentrating on large puzzles, building Lego creations, playing with Playmobil guys and looking through books.

Then school started and you were spending more time away from home. Plus your sister has become a very good playmate. And you turned five.  So whatever the reason is or perhaps all of the above, you have started going off downstairs (or up to your room) to play for long stretches of time. You aren’t coming to me with suggestions of what to play. You aren’t moping around the house looking bored. You aren’t asking to go somewhere every two seconds. It’s the most welcome change ever! Probably as cool as when you started sleeping through the night.

So what’s the funniest thing of all? The other day I came downstairs to play with you and Charlotte. Figuring that would be the greatest thing you’d hear- mom coming to play! But you looked at me and said, “um Mom, can you please go back upstairs. We’re playing and can’t be bothered.” You totally kicked me out! Of course I respected your need for privacy and really it’s all I could wish for. That you and Charlotte can’t be content on your own. Playing together without issues. Working out conflict on your own and being brother and sister. So I listened at the top of the stairs for a few minutes and then went off to work in the office.